so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Randomize
