you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
