Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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