how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
