Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
Randomize
