She is in my trunk
Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
Randomize
