Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
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