It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
Im sweating champagne and woke up in nothing but a tuxedo jacket. What didnt go wrong last night?
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
