I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
