I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
