Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
