I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
i barfeds in our rink
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize
