We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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