i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Randomize
