I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Randomize
