dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
