ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
