What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Damn victory sex feels great
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