So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
