So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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