Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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