Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
i've created a new STD.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Randomize
