My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
