At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
worst night to have a conscience
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
