i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
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