I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Did you just see the Batmobile???
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I'm Michael Phelps, Olympic Champion.
Are you just smoking weed? Cause that's not actually a Michael Phelps costume
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
