we're chasing vodka with high fives
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
