..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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