I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
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