I understand Curling. That high.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
My liver just had a heart attack.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Randomize
