not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
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