Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
