how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
