pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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