Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
Randomize
