He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
