Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
