I wish my penis had an off switch
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Randomize
