Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
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