My room smells like vodka and shame
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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