My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
