Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Randomize
