She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
