the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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