Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Randomize
