Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
