My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Its about making memories worth repressing
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
