was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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