You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Randomize
