gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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