so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize
